Wayward Landlubber

Office of St Peter Celestial Realm Attn. Saint Peter.                                                                                         Office of hypocrisy                                                                                          Liberty University Sir:  I write to request your forgiveness of Jerry Falwell Jr. He feels awful about being caught watching the pool boy shtup his wife. While he feels sorry for Becky, having to find her liaisons in other ways, he has assured me that he will now whack-off watching porn DVDs, there are, he tells me, several featuring poolboys and pizza delivery boys. Both he and Becky are having to live on reduced circumstances, having been fired by the University and having a small severance of only $10.1 million. These are placing a further strain on the family finances. We all know that Jesus died for our sins. His sacrifice would be in vane if we didn't sin, right? We all know the stories of people of faith whose faith was found wa

     Those of us of a peculiar persuasion have long espoused verbally, if not by our actions, this simple aphorism. It is an acknowledgement of our place in the world, and an affirmation that money spent in our local community benefits far more than the farm or business, or restaurant where they are spent. This is known by the coldly scientific term, synergy: to work together. The parable of the "loaves and fishes, from the New Testament, is a good example of synergism. The people were hungry, Jesus fed them, and they stayed to marvel at his sermon. But on this subject I am hardly qualified, so I will try some other examples which I may be more qualified to discuss. I will, first focus your attention to the backyard and gradually widen the focus.      There is no greater connection to the web of life than composting. When done right, composting starts with our non-meat kitchen scraps, coffee grounds and eggshells, combined with the dead leaves of autumn, plant trimming and lawn cl