Wayward Landlubber

   I grew up in a Protestant tradition, though not fervently pursued. So, in a time of personal crisis even a secular humorist can be tempted to seek divine comfort. It was at just such a time that I found myself in the receiving line after a Unitarian service. I am an unapologetic liberal, and have been most of my adult life. While quick to see the yawning chasm between the Jimmy Carter Christian's and the Pat Robertson Christians, I have kept both at arms length. However an existential crisis drove me to seek desperate measures.    The Unitarian Church has long been a haven for progressive thinkers. Speakers on issues such as the environment, economic diversity, or the consequences of corporate personhood could often be found renting out a Unitarian Church to deliver their speeches. I sometimes found myself in attendance. The cars in the parking lot of the Unitarian Church have bumper stickers that read: Earth love it or leave it!, or well-behaved women never make...

     There aren't many conservative humorists deserving  of the name. Dennis Miller was a funny guy on Saturday Night Live, but his career tanked when he was hired byFoxNews.  Conservative humor is not ironic it is cruel, as befitting Libertarianism, sometimes called the death of altruism. P.J. O'Roarke is a notable exception. I have chuckled at his humorous ripostes over the years even as he slid the knife across liberal throats. He is that quintessential Libertarian. A political orientation that thinks of itself as better than the more prosaic Democrats and Republicans. Never-the-less, when the votes are counted they are spooning with the Republicans. Paul Ryan would be one of them but like most Republicans, he is not funny.      One of my favorite quips of O'Roarke's is, "the Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass from your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says govern...

     I first met Robert when he walked into our Toastmasters meeting at Warner Creek Correctional Facility, a minimum security prison. We were a small group of ten to twelve reliable members. On that particular night we were expecting a new member to give his Icebreaker speech. People usually take a few weeks to write that speech, partly to overcome their shyness and fear, and partly to compose a speech that will withstand the inevitable critique. That person did not show up. Robert offered to step into the spotlight with no script or preparation. He gave a remarkably good speech. Funny, self-effacing, and honest. Robert was a full-blooded Native-American, an Ojibwa from the province of Ontario, Canada. He had left school in the fifth grade and run away from home. First Nation tribal members were given dual US and Canadian citizenship, mostly because their ancestral tribes may well have been forced to move north by the US cavalry. An additional factor was because, prior t...

     The presidential briefings on Covid 19 have been temporarily halted. May this day be blessed! What finally stopped the president from trudging on with these extemporaneous displays of madness, was his spectacular plunge in popularity. Republican knees are clacking together as they see their party going down on the same suicide plane as Trump. It is they, the party leadership who will be held responsible. I will enjoy that moment, holding it close to my bosom until the twitch of life leaves me. Hold on,  NEWS FLASH! Trump changed his mind. We eagerly await more opportunities to witness Trumps madness. Some future day we may bless his disappearance from our political life.      I am no fan of the Republican party. I was too young to remember the McCarthy era, but I know the history well. That seething belligerence has long hid in the shadows of the Republican party. It was also a part of the Democratic party during the Civil Rights era, but the lead...

     If there is anybody out there reading my blog, you will know how much I love satire. Irony is a part of satire. Often, that irony has an element of self-deprecating humor, which along with oppressing the comfortable, is the highest form of humor.       Here we are with Covid 19 causing businesses and public places to close. That includes libraries and bars, which maintained our sanity in previous crisises. My book, THE MARITIME ADVENTURES OF THE WAYWARD LANDLUBBER, is now published. My first cache of books have been ordered in expectation of promoting this labor of love. Where do I promote it? Fortunately literature is timeless, even mediocre literature. Even Romance novels and survivalist novels. I live each day in expectation of promoting my book. That expectation will take a little more time. It may be true that my poor missive is no more important than that Romance Fiction, but it has been a labor of love. For some of us adventure is a fleetin...

     The term, conservative used to imply a cautious person, deliberative, with a respect for tradition and social norms. Republicans have long bragged about their conservatism while disparaging their Democratic opponents. As in most things political, these comparisons were exaggerated. Neither party has been successful in fulfilling their promises, though the Democrats have had some notable success in social and human rights since the last half of the twentieth century. And some unrecognized success in economics. Republicans started admirably in the last half of the nineteenth century to extend the blessings of democracy to all Americans (except for native Americans), but have fallen in that commitment in recent decades. For most of this time both parties were lead by people of intelligence who discouraged radical moves within each party. I may not have agreed with those intelligent people, but their party did not appear to be an existential threat to those of us on the ...

I'm retired and have a small 401-K, which I needed to roll my retirement fund into at 70 1/2.  We have hope, but feel like dopes.

Why do men call their nether regions, the tiny area hidden by Trumps orlap, their "junk"? 

Men of my age tempt fate wearing tan slacks in public.

   Progressive politics requires a tenuous dance between conservatives and liberals. Liberals are Fred Astire, conservatives are Ginger Roger's. Together they move fluidly and gracefully across the political stage, conservatives dancing ever so slightly backwards and liberals leading sensitively and sensuously. The problem between Jan. 20 2009 and 2017 was Obama was Fred Astaire and conservatives in Congress were Kate Smith. In 2016 we elected Kate Smith in drag and the legislature, especially the Senate was the Keystone Kops.