007 MEETS INSPECTOR CLOUSSEAU.

     I grew up in the cold war. We read  Spy novels, written by former spies like John Le Carre and Graham Greene.  And watched movies, James Bond of course, but there were others. Humorous spy cartoons and TV shows were also abundant, from Spy vs Spy in Mad Magazine, to Boris and Natasha on the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoon show, to OUR MAN FLINT and GET SMART on TV. Since the fall of the Berlin Wall, we have had little to laugh at on that spellbinding level. Not until the Republican party became a wholly-owned subsidiary of the Crazy Caucus. 

     The latest installment of WTF comes from the Wall Street Journal, once the pre-eminant print business daily in the world. That was before Rupert Murdock purchased the paper to make it the premier rightwing print daily for oligarchs. Wait, isn't that like a spy embedding into an organization and posing as a friend of capitalism who is really a friend to oligarchic capitalism? I'm confused. Hell, I don't even know anymore if capitalism is spelled with an 'A' or an 'O' in the third syllable. But back to the topic. In an opinion by the Editorial Board, of the once-esteemed WSJ, Michael Gableman, a former Wisconsin Supreme Court Justice who was hired by the GOP (silent Q?)to investigate the 2020 election in Wisconsin, was charged with  looking  for suspected voter fraud. Being the cautious judge and not having evidence to show them, he has filed for an extension, prompting the WSJ to question whether he was a "secret Democratic double agent". This is the realm of SPY vs SPY.

     Let us examine the subject further: if Michael Gableman were a simple agent (spy), he would be a Democrat who has burrowed into the Republican party to get the goods on the Republican party or vice versa. If his mission was actually a democratic mission (i.e. in defense of small 'd' democracy) he would be looking for true voter fraud and even the more serious election fraud, regardless of which party was caught. The mission he was hired for, which he is being criticized by the Murdock machine for not fulfilling, is to find evidence of enough voter fraud to put the 2020 presidential election in doubt, an election it should be noted, that the former president and chronic cry-baby, won by one half of a percent. Republicans in a former time would have accepted winning the state graciously,and shed his tears in private that the national popular vote did not favor him. Even worse, he lost the electoral college, something Republicans have not experienced in 30 years.  He should have set his sight on the next election, or better yet, GOLF. Golf would be what most of us wish. Judge Gabelman is, we may assume, not charged with exposing voting suppression tactics Republicans have spent years rigging in their favor. But the good folks on the Wall Street Journal editorial board have accused him of being a double agent. 

      This is skating on thin ice. Frozen ground that most of us have never traversed except through the words of a talented writer. A double agent, by this example, would be a Republican posing as a Democrat who is feeding information to the republicans. This is a complicated and confusing concept for a party that believes male virility can be enhanced by testicle tanning. If Mr. Gableman was a Democrat posing as a republican who is passing information on the Democrats, he would have taken a heckuva lot of time to reach the starting point. He first has to live the life of a Democrat long enough to develop some alliances close to the top. That requires time, and some competance, a thing long in decline in the Republican party. Next he has to find the black bag gang that runs the party spy network. I'm not saying there isn't a Democratic spy network,  I'm just saying we don't have people like Roger Stone. Once you are comfortable as a high-level spy for Democrats, then you have to go under cover in the Republican party. All together to this point you have easily seen 10 years go by.

     Now comes the hard part. You are a super-competant spy, not merely competant. Mere competance can get you into the Selective Service, maybe even presidential detail, you are aiming higher. How does this super-competant spy melt into the spy network of Roger Stone or James O'Keefe of the ironically-named Veritas Project? Or even more advantageously, Donald Trump Jr? This must take nerves of steel to not have that nagging fear that you, "might be made", because you are too visibly competent. But you are super-competant so you are competant enough to play like an incompetant buffoon who does not care if his fingerprints are all over a thing. Academy Awards are given out for performances like this. 

      You make it! You are now undercover in the Democratic party that nutured you so long ago. To get this far might take an additional 5 years. That brings your professional life to 15 or 20 years. You're losing a step. The retirement clock has started, you may have lost some of your spy skills in your time as a Republican. Things like subtlety, quick thinking, mingling with super-competant people. Talents not usually observable in todays GOP (Q silent). Super-competant people, who are well aware of the republican spy network. People looking for a mole. The mole that you now are.

     This is not SPY vs SPY, not Get Smart. It has tantalizing similarities to Boris and Natasha. 

This is like James Bond meets Inspecter Clousseau. Look for it in an upcoming book by Dave Barry.